Blog readers, I think I am in love with a movie about a vampire. No, not that one about the stupid sparkly vampire, but one that is much more awesome. Which movie is this, you ask? Well feast your eyes on . . .
After being alerted to this movie’s existence by the lovely BC of Horror Movie A Day, I think I might have to see it. A description of the plot that I found on the internet (I have bolded the most amazing parts for your convenience):
“Rockula is about a male vampire who lost his lady love centuries ago. She was killed by a pirate with a rhinestone peg leg, wielding a large ham bone. Our hero, the vampire, did nothing to save her. So he is now cursed to watch her be born again in another life, and then watch her die, strangely enough by a pirate with a rhinestone peg leg, wielding you-know-what. Now, in 1990, he has, he suspects, his last chance to try to save her instead of watching get clubbed over and over again down through the years. Oh, and he becomes a rock star in the process.”
Yes, I too doubted its magnificence at first, but then I discovered two magical things:
1) It stars both Thomas Dolby and Tony Basil!
2) It features a romantic duet in which a dude is hit by a car and beaten up by bums and he never stops singing! Talk about major commitment to a part!
In all seriousness, I know that this sounds awful, but I think it might be so awful that it doubles back around to being awesome. What say you, audience? You think this is the worst thing you have seen in your life or is it worth a double bill with Boogie Town*?
Watch the trailer (which also features the vampire rapping!) and decide**!
* Actually wait, that sounds just as bad . . .
**Or have more self-respect than I do and don’t.