(Someone I know quoted this line this morning and it made me laugh so I’ve used it as my title. I think I need to watch Office Space again soon as my own office is almost as quirky.)
So, as you may have noticed, I kind of took last week off from here. I’ve got to say, it was kind of nice. I’ve been feeling kind of frustrated and burned out recently, so it felt kind of like a relief to me to not be beholden to anything for a little bit. No regular blogging. No list items. No nothing.
Instead of that stuff, I’ve been putting my energy into trying to change my day-to-day situation (a.k.a. the gig). I am probably a bit of a bonehead trying to initiate a search in a competitive field during a recession, but as I am feeling myself inching towards a breaking point, I know that I have got to try.
I hate feeling bored and unfulfilled.
I hate having to constantly pick up the slack for others (someone called in today for the sixth day this month).
But most of all, I hate waking up every morning with that feeling in the pit of my stomach. That horrible, sour, “Oh please, not there again” feeling.
I hate that feeling, not only because it’s causing me to pop antacids all the time, but because this is coming from a job that I used to love and that I consider myself good at. I love working hard and sloughing through a bunch of work. I mean that rush and sense of accomplishment you get when you cross the finish line is awesome. But when you feel like you’re by yourself when you’re supposed to be part of a team, it sucks tremendously.
Anyway, there have been some recent developments that give me hope. One, the department I work for is talking about hiring another person so at least there might be someone else starting that can be trained to help with some of the craziness (I’ve worked the last two busy seasons understaffed which is not fun) and two, there have actually been a couple of breaks in my search.
One of course, was the Penguin gig and then the day after, I found a posting for one at Kids Can Press which would also be pretty amazing since I have long been interested in working in kidlit.
However putting aside shop talk for a minute, this weekend was actually quite a bit of fun and helped to ease some of my tension as of late. On Saturday night, Boy and I grabbed burgers at a deluxe burger place (35 different kinds) with our friends Jack and Sally and after dinner, retired to our cleaned up place to play Left 4 Dead/talk about wedding stuff. Both Boy and I are in the wedding party for their Halloween nuptials and as a former wedding vet (I actually blogged for a popular wedding site for a time), Sally and I discussed some of the stuff that needed to get done in the next seven months. I’ve got to say, it was kind of nice to be on the other side of things for a change. As much as I loved our wedding (and I totally did), having some distance from the stress of planning definitely makes it easier to deal with.
Then, on Sunday, we went to see Boy’s brother Logan get his black belt in Muay Thai kickboxing. I had never seen Logan do any of his martial arty stuff before, but it basically confirmed to me that:
a) I am incredibly out of shape.
b) I am now related to someone who could easily be a character in Street Fighter.
I mean, Logan is naturally very mild mannered, but his skills in ass-kickery are a bit intimidating to someone whose only natural means of defense are pinching and extremely bony elbows.
In any case, that is where things stand right now. I will hopefully get the chance to write again later about silly things like Ron Perlman and annoying hipster hair dressers, but I figured at least a minor update was in order.
Hope everyone else had an awesome weekend and look forward to “seeing” some of you at tomorrow’s book club! 🙂
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