Adolph Hitler Campbell.
They were especially mad because the same store had denied several previous birthday cakes requests from them to put their other kids’ names on cakes (the parents also named his siblings JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell and Honszlynn Hinler* Jeannie Campbell) along with a swastika design.
Of course, when this hit the internet, people were enraged, but apparently this shocked the father, Heath Campbell, who said:
“(I liked the name because) no one else in the world would have that name . . . There’s a new president and he says it’s time for a change; well it’s time for a change.”
Campbell also went on to defend himself by saying they weren’t Nazis because Adolph’s birthday party was supposed to have “mixed race” children in attendance and “if we’re so racist, then why would I have them come into my home?”
This bugs me on several levels. First of all jackhole, it’s a free market and the people at the bakery were fully within their rights to say no way to your order. Secondly, no one else in the world has your kid’s name because you named him after a monster who killed millions of people! Thirdly, while there is a new president, he is also a member of a race that would have been slaughtered by your son’s namesake, so I doubt he’s sitting in his office planning a tickertape parade for you! And fourthly, don’t pretend that you are not a racist. Because after giving your three kids white supremacist names and making a point of disgustedly referring to their friends as “mixed race,” you are. And acting like you’re not just actually makes people hate you more. I mean, they’d still hate you if you were open about it, because Nazis are creepy assholes**, but pretending your white robes are just kicky pajamas is insulting because it’s just your lame attempt to project your crazy onto others by convincing them that they are completely misinterpreting your $h!tty behaviour. GAH!
Anyway, according to follow-up reports on the internet, the children were recently removed from the home by social services (for reasons other than their naming), but part of me wonders what will happen from here with this crazy family. Will the parents have three replacement children and name them Auchzwitz, Goebbles and Gestapo? Will the children be adopted and renamed? And when they grow up, will they be told that this ever happened? Or will they only discover the horrible truth when they’re adults and married to God’s Chosen People?
I guess only time will tell, but I really hope those kids get to grow up outside of that messed-up environment and do some good in the world. It’d be a nice karmic kick in the face to their jerk of a dad.
*This is apparently a tribute to Heinrich Himmler.
** At least I know I would since my Bubbi had family members who were either inturned or died in Concentration Camps.